Thursday, September 02, 2010

All change...

Howdy folks!

  Frank here! Well, I've had my brandy. Actually I've now had two. And, frankly speaking, I'm rather glad that I'd indulged in the finest of medicinal drinks because, shortly after my last post here, the cat and the bird sat me down to break some news to me.

  We, as in myself, Claude, and Belle, are to be re-homed.  The cat and the bird were very good and reassured us all that it wasn't because we weren't doing our jobs with pride and efficiency. Nonetheless, my rickety knees knocked; Belle's beak quivered; even Claude shed a little liquid latex tear. But the fact remains - Catbird Craft is moving house.

As much as we love our reasonably sized studio in Forest Hill, we understand that it's really not as practical as the cat and bird had hoped it would be. It may not be all that far from home but each journey to travel to and fro, a) takes time, and b) takes headspace. A+B = a drain on valuable productivity resources. The cat is a busy feline who would appreciate a little less city driving in her week, and the bird is somewhat tired and agoraphobic. For both cat and bird, relaxation is the key to being truly creative. So, all in all, when the pros and cons are totted up and the viewers votes have been counted, it makes sense to move studio to somewhere which caters for as many of their needs as possible. Personally, my attitude is that as long as it has a kettle I don't mind where we are.

    So, once I'd asked why, unsurprisingly, my next question was where? And the, somewhat crazy, response I received was this - "Well, we thought we'd move into the to the pond."
Well, of course! That absolutely would have been my first choice on new location too.
  Yes, funnily enough, my next enquiry was how. The response - "Well, we thought we'd erect a little shed and use that as a studio instead."...Drat! Now, why didn't I think of that.
  Thankfully, there are solar lights out there, confusing all the moths, so any late night treks back into the flat shouldn't result in any unexpected dips into the pond.

  To make room for the shed there are pretty plants that need to be unceremoniously dug up, and then replanted elsewhere in the garden. They will have new homes, which is good for them. But what about us? We worried that we might not be able to come to the new grotto like studio as it will be small, but we needn't have worried.
   Having discussed it with the cat and the bird, we all think Bell will be happy because there are other birds there, birds just like her. There's even an indoor tree for her to perch in when she's not on duty as the unofficial studio fire alarm.
  However, we are a little concerned about Claude. His permanently aggressive stance does somewhat intimidate the queen of cats, who is already in residence. We fear that she may, quite literally, take chunks out of him. In the likely event that a truce cannot be reached, in an unexpected turnaround, we may now need security for the studio security. If a suitable candidate can't be found then, just like little Harry Potter, Claude will have to live in the cupboard under the stairs.

"And the fifteen points go to Gryffindor"
   There is no spare room so I shall be sleeping on the sofa. I will have access to a television, which means I can watch 'Bones' whenever I like. I will be able to have a hot shower. Oh goodness, I shall be able to bake cakes until my absent heart desires no more. Suddenly, I find myself warming to this change of scenery. It may sound like retirement is appealing to me but fear not. I will continue to report on all the Catbird Craft news at every possible opportunity. I suspect that one of my first posts will involve an update on how it is that the cat and the bird manage to transport shed panels through their small and awkwardly shaped terraced flat. Over the back wall is looking the most likely option. Oh, I can hardly wait to watch this adventure unfold out of a flat pack.

This obviously revises the official launch day of Catbird Craft. We're behind schedule by a month but there will be more information to follow. Apparently, the great launch will involve a party. Count me in!

Now, after this shock announcement I really must have another brandy and a lie down.

My regards to you all,


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